The Roller Coaster of Parenthood : It Might Not Be Your Fault

Are You Happy Now?

In recent years, research has shown that having children can significantly enhance our overall sense of well-being. Many parents report that their lives feel more meaningful and fulfilling in ways that may be harder to grasp without the experience of raising a child. Still, the journey of parenthood is anything but straightforward. Our emotional landscape can vary widely, shaped by a number of personal and social factors.

What Shapes Parental Happiness

Marital status, parenting satisfaction, and cultural background all play important roles in how happiness is felt during the parenting years. A supportive partner, for example, can create an environment where joy naturally blossoms. On the other hand, a strained relationship can cast a shadow, making even joyful moments feel heavy. That’s why it’s so important to honestly reflect on these areas—they often hold the key to how we experience our daily lives.

Don’t Let Life’s Roller Coaster Rob You

As someone who’s ridden the emotional highs and lows of parenting, I know how easily our moods can rise and fall. For me, work was a major source of joy. So when things were going well professionally, I felt good about life overall. But when work wasn’t satisfying, everything seemed harder—including parenting.

If you’re feeling down, it may not be about your child at all. Often, it’s the circumstances surrounding us—things beyond our control—that chip away at our well-being. Instead of blaming yourself, try focusing on what is within reach. Even one small positive change can lead to a more peaceful, joyful heart.

In truth, unhappiness is a heavy weight to carry—especially when the cause feels out of your hands. Life is short. No matter where you are on your parenting path, take a moment to reflect: how much lighter could your days feel if you simply protected your happy mood?

I’ll be honest—I sometimes regret the moments I spent in a bad mood. If I could go back, I’d remind myself that a calm and cheerful heart is one of the greatest gifts we can give to our children. In Japan, there’s a saying: 笑門来福 (warau kado niwa fuku kitaru)—Laughter brings good fortune. It may not be easy, but it’s always possible.