No Passion in Parenting? : Here is The Hidden Love Theory

You Could Doubt Parental Love

Parenting can be an overwhelming experience, and many struggle with the expectation of unconditional love for their children. As a parent, you may feel that your love is influenced by various conditions or circumstances. This feeling isn't uncommon. Many individuals, including myself, initially pursued passions—like my music career—before embracing the responsibilities of parenthood.

The Parental Myth of Unconditional Love

Society often portrays mothers as the ultimate source of love. However, this idea can place unrealistic expectations on parents. In Japan, for instance, there’s a proverb, 産みの母より育ての母 (umino-hahayori, sodate-no-haha), which translates to "a stepmother who raises a child exceeds the biological mother." This wisdom reflects that love does not solely stem from biology; rather, it can be deeply rooted in care and dedication.

How Love Grows Through Commitment

As you invest effort and energy into raising your children, your feelings naturally deepen. It's common to think of this love as conditional; after all, does it not depend on the time and resources we commit? Yet, many parents find that no matter the circumstances, their love expands as they nurture their children. This evolution of love suggests that while you may identify as a "conditional parent," your love is ultimately unconditional. It truly flourishes when you act with intention and commitment.

Reflect on the various relationships depicted in popular media, such as the dynamics in shows like "Gossip Girl." These narratives often highlight complex emotional ties that can mirror our experiences. Parents learn to love in diverse ways, shaped by both their own backgrounds and the unique needs of their children.

Embracing the notion that you don’t have to feel unconditional love right away is liberating. Allow yourself time to grow into your parental role. The realization that love can adapt and transform through experience is crucial in your journey.

No Worries : Enjoy Your Parenting Journey

Ultimately, the path of parenting is one of growth—not just for children, but for parents as well. Acknowledge the various forms of love you can express and understand that love, while it may appear conditional at times, comes from a place of genuine care and connection. Be patient with yourself as you navigate this extraordinary journey. Remember, love deepens through the commitment you show, and over time, it can indeed become unconditional.